Commitment to Marriage Counseling


    I enjoy Kim Leatherdale's, LPC, ATR-BC, NCC blog, Creating Rewarding Relationships

    In a recent post she lists some of the signs of a lack of commitment to couples counseling. I think this is an excellent list and hope you will also check out her signs of commitment to couples therapy.

  • Not doing your "homework" between sessions
  • Only thinking about and processing the issues while you are in session
  • Avoiding true participation in session and keeping everything "light"
  • Trying to run the therapy yourself by determining what you "can" and "can't" talk about
  • Being a sporadic visitor to counseling
  • Hiding information from your counselor
  • Undermining counseling by picking fights, minimizing what the counselor teaches, and bad behaviors
  • Being a "yes man" - saying yes to what your counselor teaches and then not doing it
  • Refusing to make behavioral changes
  • Being disrespectful of the counseling directly or indirectly when not there
  • Blaming (overtly or covertly) your partner for everything
  • Not allowing your couples' counselor to speak to your individual therapist
  • Dropping out of therapy without processing the end with your counselor

A lack of commitment can reflect one partner's power being the deciding force in seeking therapy. Take time to agree on seeking therapy, even if this means delaying choosing a therapist.

For further inquiries:

Check out Lee Horton, Ph.D., Psychologist, at

Phone: (901) 818- 5450