Lessons Learned Through Divorce

- Divorce does not define you, how you get through it does. - Being your best doesn't mean being perfect.

- Turn your divorce into a beacon not an abyss.

- You learn to love yourself more than you care or love the person who hurt you.

- People don't set your limits; you do.

- Get out of your own way.

- Rise each morning with hope and anticipation in your heart. - Divorce can close you off. Stay open to see the miracles and remember, miracles don't always come with a marquee. They can be small but powerful.

- Trust your inner wisdom.

- Have your own purpose/passion.

- Do what makes you happy.

- Don't believe the naysayers and give up. Change does happen but you create the change you want.

- Life is tough, but you're tougher.

- Get out of your comfort zone.

- Just because something worked 5 years ago doesn't mean it works now. Make room for new things.

- Focus on your strengths more than improving your weaknesses. As a Man Thinketh, don't get hung up on what you're not good at, stand strong in what you are good at.

- Let go of the outcome and enjoy the moment!

- Divorce needs to be about healing, not just splitting assets. - Write down your fears post divorce and then their solutions. - Work on being open to see others point of view including your children's.

- Use divorce to course correct the rest of your life.

- Being in the present moment was never more important than now. - Don't respond to things based on your fears or hurts. Be non judgmental and don't take things personally.

- Don't be reactionary. Take a deep breath and look at the bigger picture before responding.

- Divorce is not black and white.

- If you write a story where all the blame goes on the other person, you are robbing yourself of tremendous growth.

- Divorce can become mindless if you let your ego take over. Stay in control.

- Make the most of the cards you were dealt. Don't be hard on yourself. - ALL of this is time limited.

- Find ways to lessen your daily load. Perfection is out the window. - Do the things you enjoy.

- Happiness is something we ourselves generate, not our circumstances. - Let go of things. Let go of mindsets or a belief system that no longer serves you. Let go of all the "shoulds" you have encountered in your life. - Mother's guilt is alive and well and living in your mind if you let it. - Your children will always love you and this is not a competition. - Stop worrying about what people have to say. They are not living your life.

- Your family structure has changed, so redefine it and stop struggling to keep it the same. It has changed, so change with it.

For further inquiries:

Check out Debbie Martinez, Divorce and co- parenting coach, at https://www.transformationthrudivorce.com/

Phone: (305) 984- 5121

Email: debbie@transformationthrudivorce.com