The Cost of Dating the Wrong Person


Do a few red flags mean you should run? People often say that as soon as you see things that just don't add up to what you're looking for, you should immediately walk away. Rarely do you get to hear why that might be the right decision for you. Continuing to date someone that you know is wrong for you is followed by many reasons why it's okay. Maybe you just want more experience dating. It could be that you have been single for a while and like having a consistent person around. Whatever your reasons are to continue to date someone that you know is not right for you, check the list below to see if it may be more beneficial to let them go and make space for the person that is supposed to be in your life.

Waste of time. What is something to be said about having fun experiences with someone even if you know they aren't the person that you should be with long-term the more time that you spend with that person the last time you spend on other things that could be feeling your time. At some point that relationship will end and sometimes people keep it going because they feel like I've already spent so much time doing this. While you may not see the value in your time right now, talk to people that have lived very long lives. I think about those that are no longer with us. One thing you may hear is that they wish they spent more time with people that mattered to them and people that they matter too. Spending time with someone just to fill in those moments is taking away time from you and from those that you really love.

Waste of energy. In the beginning it may seem like there's a lot of effort being put into your situation but over time as with any relationship there will take more effort to continue the relationship as it is. Even if you say you're just casually dating there will come a time when you have to make a decision on where to go see this person that you like moderately or stay comfortable on your couch. Very few relationships survive when it's one-sided so that means at some point you will have to do something that takes away your energy and invest something within that relationship.

Damage to your mental health. Depending on the red flags that you see sometimes the wrong person can truly damage your mental health. When you recognize that this person does not have your best interest at heart it is best to walk away right then and there. If you don't you risk putting up with BS that will only hurt you in the long run. There's been a mean going around that basically says your strength is not measured by the amount of pain that you endure. If you are dating someone who regularly causes you pain it is your job to stop the pain because they are not going to do it.

Baggage. Over time when you are dating the wrong person baggage is created. And while it's to sort through that baggage before entering the next relationship sometimes that baggage follows you. So that damage that was created because you didn't walk away can turn around and become damaging to the next person you're with. If you have chosen to continue to date someone that you recognize from jump was not a good fit you can in turn push away the person that was meant for you all along.

Sometimes we don't recognize that the person isn't the right fit for us until we've already invested so much. Once you get to the point of recognizing that the person was not right for you you have to assess the damage. How do you move forward without regret, guilt, or baggage? It takes work on yourself and work on your beliefs about dating and relationships.

For further inquiries:

Check out Eboni Harris, Licensed Relationship Therapist, at

Phone: (832) 384- 4445